Recently I have lost sight of a few things. Important things.
My husband and I discussed my current struggle last night, and prayed together for the Lord to remind my forgetful heart of the purposes He has for me.
And this morning, in His ever-faithful grace, He did that in a very sweet, powerful way.
My daughter has recently learned the song, The Lord’s Army, in AWANA. We were singing it on the way home from our couples’ small group on Sunday evening, in fact, trying to help her remember the words (God’s foreshadowing of where we’d be heading this week).
“I may never march in the infantry, ride in the Calvary, shoot the artillery. I may never fly o’er the enemy, but I’m in the Lord’s army!”
My daughter’s rendition and pronunciation of these words. Adorable.
So back to this morning. She tells me they sang the song again last night at AWANA, and asks if I sing it with her. We start, and she begins doing the movements she learned along with the words, adoringly shaking her hips and getting into it, Natalie-style.
And when she gets to the end, she yells loudly, “I’m in the Lord’s army! Yes, sir!”
And that’s when God reminded me of how He has answered and is still answering His promise to me.
A little over a year ago, I was sitting in a meeting at work, an all-staff one that we had every Fall as the school staff enters a new school year and the church staff prepares for the Fall groups launch and events. We started the meeting with praise and worship, and Danni Tabor & Amy Davis led us in an awesome version of Break Every Chain by Jesus Culture. And I remember sensing that something significant was happening at the time, but it wasn’t entirely clear until Pastor Beau, the head pastor, got up to speak. He referenced one of the lyrics from the song “I see an army rising up…to break every chain” and began to encourage the school and church staff to see the opportunities set before then to invest in the lives of the people they came in contact with. And I knew at that moment, it was my commission speech into a new ministry, a new mission field – to go home full-time, to resign and begin to invest in the army that God desires to raise up in my family.
This was not the first time I felt called home – I had already moved into a part-time capacity at work, following the Lord’s prompting to be at home more with my family. And I guess I knew that I would be coming home full-time at some point, but remember feeling shocked that this was indeed the moment God was confirming His calling for that.
It was a very special moment, one that I have shared with some close friends, when I felt the Lord commissioning to me to the amazing new area of ministry. It made an impression.
Recently, I have lost sight of the privilege to what I’ve been called to. I regret to say that I have allowed other things to devalue in my eyes what once I so cherished and felt so honored to do.
But in such a precious, personal way, the Lord has answered my prayer – my very own daughter singing “I’m in the Lord’s army” to me this morning, and the truth of that statement because just this past week – October 8, 2014 – my daughter and I prayed and she trusted Jesus as her Savior! I actually got to sit down with my daughter and pray through the gospel with her.
I have the amazing calling and privilege to be used by the Lord to disciple my daughter, to encourage and plant seeds of truth and learn together more about what it means to have a personal relationship with Jesus. Because you better believe the Lord is revealing more of Himself to me in ways that I never would have imagined as I step into explaining faith matters with my 4 year old.
I need to hear the gospel on that simplistic level every single day.
To see the faith of a child and know what it means to really trust and see things for the first time with new eyes.
Lord, thank you for allowing me to witness Your work first-hand, to have a front row seat to my daughter’s faith walk. I’m sorry for the ways that I have allowed other things to distract me from the value or honor that it is to be a part of your work – whatever that looks like – but in your grace and goodness, you have allowed it to be an area that I am passionate about. You have changed my heart to desire the things that You wanted me to put my hands to, faithful to your Word. You didn’t have to do that, but You did. You don’t have to use personal, meaningful things in my life to penetrate my heart and speak to me, but You do. You could just give me a general call and ask for my obedience, but instead You engage my heart and wrestle out my doubts and insecurities and fear. Thank you for continually, relentlessly pursuing me and my family in very real, personal ways. You are our beautiful inheritance. Please continue to give me eyes to see and ears to hear, and show me how to guard my heart and mind from things that will pull my heart, mind, and hands away from all that You have for me.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Thanks for letting me share!